Choosing a premarital counselor is one of the most important decisions you will make before your wedding day. If choosing a counselor seems like to daunting task, don’t worry! Here are ten tips for choosing a premarital counselor:
When it comes to choosing a premarital counselor, there are many factors to consider. First, you must be on the same page with your partner as you both weigh out what you’re looking for in a counselor.
Are you in a hurry check out these three books that we highly recommend.
- Preparing for Marriage Couples Guide
- Preparing for Marriage Leaders Guide
- The Meaning of Marriage-Timothy Keller
- Devotions for Engaged Couples- Gary Thomas
Not sure where to start with premarital counseling conversation, start here
1) Decide what you want from a counselor
When choosing a premarital counselor, you should know what type of services you’re looking for and want to receive. Some things couples may look for in a counselor are.
- Someone who specializes in marriage counseling
- One-on-one sessions
- Couple’s therapy or family therapy.
- You can also consider if the person has experience with specific issues such as divorce, abuse or addiction etc.
It’s important to know what you want from a premarital counselor before choosing one. To find the best fit for your needs and expectations as a couple.
Another thing to consider here is
- Counselor qualifications
- Counselor availability
2) Decide the gender of the premarital counselor:
Some couples may prefer choosing a counselor of the same gender. Others may want to mix things up and have a male or female as their premarital counselor.
Some couples believe that having a therapist who has similar life experiences will help them feel more comfortable during sessions. While others argue it can be helpful for the couple to get different perspectives from people with varying life experiences.
It’s important to discuss with your partner what gender you want in a premarital counselor before choosing one.
Some couples may feel more comfortable talking about personal topics with another person from their own sex. While others may prefer the opposite.
The decision is ultimately up to you, but it pays off to discuss the individuals’ desires with each other before making this critical decision
3) Decide your no negotiables as a couple
When choosing a premarital counselor, it’s best to discuss what you’re both looking for in the relationship. Then decide which of those things are not negotiable.
- These can include:
- Religious affiliation
- Type of counseling (individual or couples)
- Weekend availability and how often they want sessions.
Remember that these items should be discussed with each other before choosing one. To know what is most important to each person individually, but also together.
4) Decide Your Budget:
It’s important to set a budget for choosing your premarital counselor and decide what you are comfortable spending each session so that the sessions will be affordable without breaking your bank account.
Some counselors may have different pricing options, such as pay per hour or monthly fee for unlimited sessions. Regardless of which option is best suited for you, it’s important to discuss this together with your partner before making any decision about choosing one because there is no perfect answer here; everyone has different needs and budgets they’re working within!
It’s also important to not be swayed by the counselor who charges a lot but offers little. When choosing your premarital counselor. You want someone who will listen and address all of your concerns. Offer you feedback and give you advice on how to deal with certain situations as they arise in marriage so that it is worth paying for them!
- Also keep in mind that some counselors charge extra fees for travel or phone session costs; these should always be discussed beforehand so there are no surprises later down the road after choosing the individual! Do pastors charge for premarital counseling learn more here.
5) Consider Their Availability
Some other points to consider when choosing a premarital counselor include how often they would like therapy (weekly? bi-monthly?).
There is no perfect answer here; everyone has different schedules and life responsibilities. Choosing someone who is able to work around these limitations may be more beneficial than choosing one without any flexibility.
In addition, it’ll also help if you know what days/times would work best for each individual as well as their availability in terms of weekends or evenings.
If an individual wants therapy on weeknights after work – does he have another person at home taking care of children?
This to note: what other options are there for meeting e.g Online session, phone session etc.
6) What Type of Counseling?
It’s important to discuss the type of counseling you’re looking for as a couple. Some individuals may prefer individual therapy or couples’ sessions or group sessions.
Some couples may prefer individual therapy because it’s a different way to look at their relationship and they find that talking with the counselor in private helps them think about things differently than when choosing someone else.
Others might want group sessions because choosing one or two other individuals who are also going through this process can give you perspective on your own life as well as input from others!
Just make sure to figure out which would be best for both members of the couple so there is no confusion later down the line. Especially if choosing a premarital counselor means choosing an individual therapist !!!
7) Consider Future relationship
It is wise to select a premarital counselor who won’t just walk you through the process. But will also support you throughout your marriage.
It’s important that you’re choosing someone who will be there for both of you during every stage and not just when they meet with one person at different times.
This is why choosing an individual therapist may be beneficial. It allows them to have more time with each person individually; however, this should always be discussed as well! There are tradeoffs in choosing either option here: group sessions offer input from others while individual therapy offers privacy but less feedback/input outside what goes on within your session.
It can also depend on how much time each partner wants to be spent discussing their relationship together or separately – some couples might want dedicated tasks before talking about things privately.
You also want to consider the location of choosing a premarital counselor as well. If an individual is looking for someone closer to their work or home, this may make choosing one easier!
It’s important that they’re not too far away from your house because if it takes hours out of your day (which could be spent working!) `then it might not be worth choosing them in the end despite how good everything else sounds.
So when choosing a premarital counselor, don’t forget about travel and meeting times.
- Are there other professionals who can meet with you by phone?
- Do they offer online sessions?
Before settling on just any old premarital counselor, take time to weigh all your options. When you’re finally ready to choose a therapist, pay close attention to these considerations to avoid choosing someone who’s not the best fit for you.
9) Consider Cost
Though most churches don’t charge for premarital counseling, some pastors might decide to charge you, you can find out why they do so in this article: Should pastors charge for premarital counseling.
First, couples must consider the cost of choosing an individual therapist vs choosing someone who offers group sessions or online therapy and can be accessed anytime from any location (though there are tradeoffs to these options as well).
Second, they should also think about how often one will want to see their premarital counselor; some individuals might need multiple sessions per month while others may only want two sessions for every year – so if you’re looking at choosing a marriage counselor now but not getting married for years then keep this in mind!
Lastly, couples should consider what type of coverage each person has through work or insurance before choosing a premarital counselor because sometimes it’s cheaper than paying for private sessions out of pocket.
10) Consider the Relationship
In choosing a premarital counselor, it’s important to consider not only how you will feel about them but also your partner. We all know that relationships can be tough and choosing someone who is good at listening may make things easier!
Another thing to think about before choosing a marriage counselor is if they are going to offer any type of education sessions or workshops on family life. This way there’ll be more resources for when one might need advice in time-sensitive situations like having children together or dealing with an unplanned pregnancy.
Some people find this helpful while others don’t see the point, so it depends on what each individual wants from their relationship: some want direction every step of the way while others just want someone to talk with when they’re feeling lost.
Final Thoughts : Choosing a premarital counselor
Lastly, choosing a premarital counselor might not seem like the most exciting topic to talk about but it’s important.
It can be something that takes up hours of your time in person or over phone sessions and should never feel forced – so don’t just blindly choose someone without considering all these factors first!
In order for choosing a premarital counselor to work well, both people must know what they want out of choosing one because this is ultimately the decision-maker in choosing which type of therapist you’ll go with.
Weighing all these considerations will help couples find their perfect match who won’t ever disappoint them later down the line; though as we’ve discussed there are tradeoffs in terms of location, cost, frequency, and type of coverage one has outside chosen a premarital counselor.
So before you choose a premarital counselor, make sure you consider this thing.
Once you have found one. Make sure to check out this article here on a question to ask your premarital counselor when considering premarital counseling.
Good luck on your journey.