Are you tired of being heartbroken all the time and not seeing it coming? Or you don’t want to waste your precious life with the wrong person? Then it’s about time you learn how to recognize relationship warning signs at an early stage to avoid future hurt. We have compiled a list of the top 13 early signs that predict if your relationship will last. Some are dealbreakers, while others can be worked on with simple intentionality and commitment.
When you’re in a new relationship, it’s natural to be on your best behavior and want to make a good impression. But after the honeymoon phase wears off, the real work of maintaining a healthy, long-lasting relationship begins. How can you tell if your relationship is built to last?
Here are 13 early signs that a relationship won’t last, according to experts. If you notice any of these red flags in your own relationship, it may be time to rethink things or find help.
Recommended relationship books that helped us build a strong long-lasting relationship.
(a) Relationship Goals: How to Win at Dating
(b) Emotionally Healthy Relationships Video Study
(c) Love More, Fight Less: Communication Skills Every Couple Needs
Start a free Kindle Unlimited account and read all the books without worrying about wear and tear.
Sign 1: You’re always arguing.
No matter how madly in love you may be with your partner, there will always be disagreements, which is normal. However, if you find that you’re arguing all the time, it could be a sign that your relationship is unhealthy.
Arguing all the time is a sign that you’re not communicating effectively. Communication is critical in any relationship, and if you can’t seem to communicate without yelling at each other, it’s not going to work out.
According to research majority of couples who are constantly arguing and fighting in the early stages of their relationship- will eventually end up unhappy and unsatisfied.
Here’s a great book by Gina Senarighi, PhD, CPC Love More, Fight Less: Communication Skills Every Couple Needs is available on Amazon.
3 Reasons Why Couples Argue A lot
In the early stages of a dating relationship, couples often find themselves arguing a lot. There are several reasons for this., such as poor communication, disparate backgrounds, and selfishness.
Poor Communication
One reason why couples argue a lot in the early stages of their relationship is poor communication. When people first start dating, they may not know each other well enough to communicate effectively. This can lead to misunderstandings and frustration.
You may find that in your relationship, one is comfortable shouting while solving a problem, while the other one prefers quietly working out the issue when everyone has calmed down.
Different Backgrounds
Different families have different rules and values, and as a result, people can end up viewing things quite differently from one another. It’s only natural that there would be some disagreements, especially with this difference
It takes time to learn about someone’s triggers and what sets them off. And until you reach that point, arguments are likely to happen more frequently.
Selfishness
Another reason couples argue a lot in their early stages of dating is selfishness. Both partners want things their way and are unwilling to compromise. This can lead to a lot of arguments and resentment down the road.
Solution: Consider online counseling, doing a personality test, or reading books together to help you understand each other better.
Sign 2: You Have Different views on major life decisions
If you and your partner have completely different views when it comes to major life decisions, it may be an early sign that the relationship won’t last. For example, if you want to get married and have children while your partner doesn’t, it’s likely that eventually, those differences will catch up to you.
It’s important to be able to compromise and see eye-to-eye on major decisions in a relationship; otherwise, it can create a lot of tension and conflict. If you’re constantly butting heads with your partner over what you want for your future, it may be time to rethink the relationship.
Ask her these 90 questions before you commit to her.
Sign 3: You Are Abused
There are many early signs that a relationship won’t last, but one of the most telling is abuse. Abuse can come in many forms, but any form of abuse is a clear sign that your partner doesn’t respect you and doesn’t value your relationship. If you’re in a relationship and notice any form of abuse, it’s a huge red flag that the relationship is toxic.
If you’re in a relationship where you feel unsafe or like you’re being mistreated, it’s important to get out as soon as possible. This can be verbal, physical, emotional, or sexual abuse.
If you’re being abused, don’t fool yourself into thinking that your partner will change or that the abuse will stop. It’s important to get out of an abusive relationship as soon as possible and seek help from a support group or hotline. Don’t stay in a situation that is harmful to you, both physically and emotionally.
Here’s how long a relationship lasts on average.
Sign 4: Unhealthy Communication: Yelling, Name-Calling, and Criticism.
A new study has revealed the early signs that a relationship won’t last. Researchers found that unhealthy communication, such as yelling and name-calling, and criticism is a major predictor of relationship failure.
The study surveyed more than 140 couples in the early stages of dating or marriage. Participants were asked about their communication habits, including;
- How often they engaged in negative communication (such as name-calling or yelling) and,
- How often they engaged in Positive communication (such as compliments or expressing gratitude)?
The results showed that couples who engaged in more negative communication were more likely to break up or get divorced. Positive communication, on the other hand, was not predictive of relationship success.
These findings suggest that healthy communication is essential for a lasting relationship.
Sign 5: Avoiding difficult conversations
When you’re in a new relationship, it’s easy to avoid difficult conversations. You’re both still getting to know each other, and you don’t want to rock the boat. However, avoiding difficult conversations can be a sign that your relationship won’t last.
If you’re not able to have tough conversations with your partner early on, it will be difficult to resolve disagreements in the future. You’ll start to bottle up your feelings and, eventually, they’ll come out in an unhealthy way. It’s important to be able to communicate openly with your partner about what’s bothering you.
If you find yourself or your partner constantly avoiding difficult conversations, it may be time to reassess your relationship. Talking to a counselor or a friend might help.
Sign 6: One person is always pushing for more commitment.
High commitment early on is a strong predictor of success. We wrote a blog on it ” Why commitment is important“.
If you find that you’re always the one pushing for more commitment from your partner, it may be an early sign that they’re not as invested in the relationship as you are.
“One of the key components of a lasting relationship is a mutual investment,” says psychologist Dr. Tina B. Tessina. “If one person is doing all the work to keep things going, it’s not likely to last.”
Sign 7: Disrespectful behavior
A new study has revealed that one early sign that a relationship won’t last is disrespectful behavior.
The research, which was conducted by the University of Georgia, looked at couples who had been married for less than six months. The findings showed that those who reported feeling disrespected by their partner were more likely to get divorced within the first four years of marriage.
Disrespectful behavior can include anything from talking down to you, making negative comments about you, or belittling your accomplishments.
So if you’re in a new relationship and you notice some disrespectful behaviors from your partner, don’t ignore them! Address them immediately so you can figure out whether or not the relationship is worth saving.
Sign 8: Not making time for each other
A new relationship is an exciting time. Everything is new and you can’t get enough of each other. But if your partner isn’t making time for you, it’s a sign that the relationship might not last.
Investing in a relationship takes time and effort. If your partner isn’t willing to put in the work, it’s likely that they’re not interested in the long term. If you’re always the one chasing them, trying to schedule time together, it’s not sustainable.
Of course, every relationship has its ups and downs. But if your partner consistently doesn’t make time for you, it’s a silent red flag that the relationship might not be worth your investment.
Sign 9: Not feeling comfortable around each other
If you’re constantly feeling uncomfortable or on edge around your partner, it’s a key sign that your relationship won’t last. Maybe you don’t trust them completely, or maybe you’re just not feeling safe. Either way, it’s not a good sign for the future of your relationship.
Without trust, it’s very difficult to feel secure in a relationship. So if you’re not feeling comfortable around your partner, it’s important to take a step back and assess the situation. This article might help 9 Signs it’s time to break up”.
Sign 10: Having conflicting relationship objectives
When it comes to relationships, having different relationship visions is often an early sign that the relationship will be frustrating.
This is because, in order for a relationship to be fulfilling and successful, both partners need to be on the same page when it comes to what they want out of the relationship.
If one partner is looking for a serious, long-term commitment while the other is simply looking for something casual, it’s unlikely that the relationship will be able to survive in the long run.
So, if you’re in a new relationship and you’re already noticing that your partner has different relationship goals than you do, it may be best to end things now before it gets too complicated or heartbreaking down the line.
Here’s a great book by Mike Tod on relationship goals.
Sign 11: One person neglects or dismisses the other’s feelings and needs
When two people are in a relationship, it’s important that both partners feel valued and heard. If one person consistently neglects or dismisses the other’s feelings and needs, it’s a sign that the relationship is not built on a foundation of mutual respect.
This is called “emotional invalidation,” and it’s a form of emotional abuse.
If you’re being emotionally invalidated by your partner, they may:
- Make fun of your feelings or tell you that you’re overreacting
- Tell you that your feelings are wrong or unimportant.
- Invalidate your experiences by gaslighting you or telling you that you’re imagining things.
- Blame you for their own hurtful actions or words.
- Withhold affection or love as a way to control or punish you.
Emotional invalidation is harmful because it leads to feelings of isolation, anxiety, and low self-esteem. Are you dating a Nacisity find out here.
Sign 12: Not Taking Responsibility for their mistakes
In every relationship, there are bound to be disagreements and mistakes. However, if your partner is constantly refusing to take responsibility for their mistakes, it’s a clear sign that the relationship won’t last.
If they are constantly making excuses or trying to blame others for their shortcomings, it’s a sign that they aren’t willing to work on themselves or improve the relationship. This lack of accountability can be a major dealbreaker in the long run.
Sign 13: Your partner is constantly seeking validation and approval from others.
If your partner is constantly seeking validation and approval from others, it’s likely that they will always be influenced by other people’s opinions. This means that they may not be able to make decisions for themselves or stand up for themselves in a relationship.
This can create tension and conflict in the relationship, as you may not always agree on what is best. While it’s important to consider other people’s opinions, your partner should ultimately make decisions based on what they feel is right for the relationship, not what others think.
If you’re finding that your partner is constantly looking to others for approval, it may be time to have a discussion about what you both need from the relationship.
Final Thoughts
In conclusion, these are 13 early signs that a relationship may not last. If you notice any of these signs in your own relationship, it may be time to have a serious talk with your partner. Of course, every relationship is different, and these signs may not necessarily mean that your relationship is doomed. However, it is important to be aware of the early warning signs so that you can address any issues before they become too big to ignore.
Here’s the final list-13 Early Signs A Relationship Won’t Last
- You’re always arguing.
- You have different views on major life decisions.
- You are abused.
- Unhealthy Communication: Yelling, Name-Calling, and Criticism
- Avoiding difficult conversations
- One person is always pushing for more commitment.
- Disrespectful behavior
- Not making time for each other.
- You don’t feel at ease around each other.
- Having competing relationship goals
- One person neglects or dismisses the other’s feelings and needs
- Failure to Accept Responsibility for Mistakes
- Your partner is constantly seeking validation and approval from others.