godly dating 101 guide

Godly dating 101!

Dating is not specifically mentioned in the Bible, but there are principles we can glean from Scripture about relationships. 

In this article, I will teach you everything you need to know about godly dating. You will learn the importance of shared values, how to date with purpose, and how to keep God at the center of your relationship. 

What is godly dating?

A godly dating approach is one that is based on biblical principles a relationship that is intentional, purposeful, and God-centered.

It is a way of dating that is focused on building a relationship with someone who shares your values and worldview. This type of dating is not just about finding a spouse, but also about finding a friend with whom you can share your faith and love.

Related Post: 3 Purposes of dating and Why They Matter Today

In a society where dating has become so casual, it’s important to remember that our dates can be used as an opportunity to honor God. We can make decisions about who we date and how we date with intentionality, seeking to grow in Him and reflect His love.

When we date someone, we have an opportunity to love them well and point them to Jesus. This may look different from couple to couple, but it’s important that we are always considering how our actions (and words) and behavior might be impacting the person we’re with.

Is Cuddling A Sin According to The Bible

Dating can be a fun way to get to know someone, but it’s also a serious decision. We should pray for wisdom as we date, asking God to help us discern who is the best match for us. If you have already made the decision to be with someone, here are 10 principles to having a godly relationship.

Godly Dating Principle 1: Date with a purpose

When you date with a purpose, you’re not just looking for a casual fling; you’re looking for your future spouse.

Is Cuddling A Sin According to The Bible

Dating with a purpose means that you’re not just going out with anyone; you have specific criteria in mind. You’re looking for someone who meets your standards, someone you could see yourself marrying.

This doesn’t mean that you’re picky or that you have high standards; it just means that you know what’s important to you and you’re not willing to compromise on those things.

When you date with a purpose, you’re also more likely to stay focused and avoid getting sidetracked.

1 Corinthians 7:9 9 But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

Point to Note: When you date with a purpose, you are focused on the future and what God has planned for you. This does not mean that you cannot have fun while you are dating, but it does mean that you are not looking for a casual relationship.

Related Post: 8 Stages of Dating (revealed)

Godly Dating Principle 2: Date With Intention to Honor God

The second godly dating principle is to date with the intention to honor God. This means that you should make decisions about dating based on what you think God would want for you, not based on what you want.

It also means that you should date someone who will help you grow closer to God, not someone who will pull you away from Him.

Finally, it means that your relationship with God should be your top priority, even above your relationship with your significant other.

1 Thessalonians 4:3-8 3 It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; 4 that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, 5 not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; 6 and that in this matter no one should wrong or take advantage of a brother or sister. The Lord will punish all those who commit such sins, as we told you and warned you before. 7 For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. 8 Therefore, anyone who rejects this instruction does not reject a human being but God, the very God who gives you his Holy Spirit.

Godly Dating Principle 3: Date with  Boundaries

When two people become involved in a Christian relationship, it is important for them to establish boundaries. These boundaries will help to protect the sanctity of the relationship and keep each individual accountable. Without boundaries, it is easy for one person to cross over into territory that is not theirs, which can lead to heartache and confusion.

Boundaries are not just physical barriers, but they are also emotional ones. In a Christian relationship, it is essential that both parties feel safe and protected. This means setting limits on what each person can say and do. Boundaries help to ensure that each person remains respectful of the other, even when things get tough.

Boundaries are not always easy to put into place, but they are worth the effort. When both parties are willing to work together, they can create a foundation of trust that will be beneficial in the long run.

Finally, boundaries are important in Christian relationships because they reflect our love for God. We want to be respectful of His laws and our own personal convictions.

Learn how to effectively establish and communicate boundaries here.

Godly Dating Principle 4: Seek Godly Counsel

One of the most important things in a godly relationship is seeking wise counsel. This means that you and your partner go to someone else for guidance and wisdom when you need it.

It can be a pastor, counselor, or another couple who has been married for a long time. This is a vital part of any relationship because it helps keep you accountable and on track. It also allows you to grow in your relationship with God and each other.

Some things to consider when seeking wise counsel are:

  1. What are the goals of our relationship?
  2. What are our values and how do they align?
  3. How do we handle disagreements and conflict?
  4. How do we support each other emotionally?
  5. How does our family background affect our relationship?

It’s important to be honest and open with your partner when discussing these things with your mentors. Here’s the reality of accountability in Christian relationships.

Godly Dating Principle 5: Agree on the direction

When dating, it is important for a couple to agree on the direction the relationship is heading. This means that they should have a discussion about what each person wants out of the relationship. If they can’t agree, then it may be best to end things before they get too serious.

One reason why agreeing on the direction is important is because it can help prevent misunderstandings. If one person thinks the relationship is headed toward marriage while the other person just wants to stay friends, there will definitely be problems.

Amos 3:3 Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?

Another reason why agreeing on the direction is important is because it can make things easier down the road. If one person wants to move in together( we don’t recommend it) and the other person doesn’t, things could get really complicated really fast.

By agreeing on the direction early on, both people know where they stand and there won’t be any surprises later on.

Learn how to effectively craft a relationship vision and communicate your intentions.

Godly Dating Principle 6: Commit your plans to the Lord

One of the most important things you can do in your relationship is to commit your plans to the Lord. When you make decisions together as a couple, pray about them and seek His guidance. He will help you to make wise choices that will bless your relationship.

The Bible says, “Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established” (Proverbs 16:3). When you put your trust in Him, He will help you to follow through with your commitments. He knows what is best for you, and when you let Him lead, you can be sure that your relationship will be blessed.

Prayer is a vital part of any strong relationship. Take time each day to talk with God about your loved one. Thank Him for all the good things in your relationship and ask Him to help you overcome any challenges that come up.

Proverbs 16:3 
3Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.

Godly Dating Principle 7: Invest in Devotions and Prayer

When it comes to a successful relationship, many couples believe that investing in devotion and prayer is the key.

There are several reasons why this is so important.

First, spending time together in prayer allows you to connect with God as a couple. This can create a strong spiritual bond that will help keep your relationship strong during difficult times.

Additionally, praying together can help you develop closer communication with each other. This is because you are sharing a special experience and communicating on a deeper level than just words.

Finally, devotions and prayer help keep your focus on what is truly important in life – your relationship with God and each other.

When you have this focus, Satan will find it much more difficult to come between you. So, if you want to have a strong and lasting relationship, invest in devotions and prayer! Here are some amazing books you can read together as a couple.

Godly Dating Principle 8: Do not Cover Up Sin

When you date someone, you are opened up to a whole new level of vulnerability. You are sharing your heart with this person and hoping that they will reciprocate those feelings.

This is why it is so important to date someone who shares your values and who you can trust. If you are dating someone who does not have the same values as you, then it can be very easy for them to lead you astray.

One of the biggest dangers when dating someone is compromising your own beliefs in order to make them happy. This is something that the devil looks for. He wants to get a foothold in your life so that he can compromise your beliefs and eventually lead you astray.

It is important that you do not cover up sin in order to make someone happy. If they cannot accept you for who you are, then they are not worth your time.

Proverbs 28:13 (KJV)
13 He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy.

Godly Dating Principle 9: Do Not date in isolation

Isolation is an interesting thing. It can be a great place to find peace and reflect on the world around you. It can also be a terrible place to be, especially when it comes to relationships. Study shows that dating in isolation for Christians is dangerous for a few reasons.

First of all, when you date in isolation, you are much more likely to get abused. If no one knows about your relationship, then there is no one to step in and help you if things get bad.

In fact, many abusive relationships go on for years because the victim is too afraid to tell anyone what is happening.

Another reason dating in isolation is dangerous is because it causes people to sin. When we’re cut off from the rest of the world, we can start to make bad decisions based on what we think is right instead of what God tells us is right. We can also become very isolated from God Himself, which can be dangerous spiritually.

Godly Dating Principle 10:Have Fun

When you think of a Christian relationship, what comes to mind? For many people, the first thought that crosses their minds is that Christian relationships are boring.

This could not be further from the truth! In fact, having fun in your Christian relationship is one of the most important things you can do.

Related Post: Are Christian relationships Boring?

Here are four reasons why having fun in your Christian relationship is so important:

  1. The fun keeps your relationship fresh and exciting. If you only spend time together doing serious things, it can quickly become dull and boring. But when you add in some fun activities, it keeps things interesting and prevents your relationship from becoming stale.
  2. Fun strengthens your bond as a couple. When you share in laughter and good times together, it builds a stronger connection between you both. This helps to create a foundation that can withstand any storm that comes your way.

Thing To Avoid In A Christian Relationship

When it comes to relationships, there are a lot of things to avoid. For Christians, there are a few more things to avoid than for those who don’t have faith. Here are some tips for avoiding pitfalls in your Christian relationship:

  • First and foremost, we need to avoid sin. We need to be careful not to let our sinful nature take control. We also need to be careful not to lead our partners into sin.
  • Second, we need to avoid judging one another. We need to remember that nobody is perfect and that we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. We need to accept one another for who we are, our faults and all.
  • Third, Don’t put your partner on a pedestal. It’s important to remember that they are human beings just like you, with faults and weaknesses.
  • Fourth, Don’t let jealousy get the best of you. Jealousy can lead to insecurity and suspicion, which will only damage your relationship.
  • Finally, we need to avoid putting ourselves in situations where temptation will be high. We need to be careful not to spend too much time alone with someone of the opposite sex, for example.


In conclusion, while there is no one formula for godly dating, the principle I shared will help you. We should date with intentionality, keeping our ultimate goal in mind.

We should also date with purity and patience, taking the time to get to know the other person and waiting for God’s timing in our relationship.

By following these 10 principles, we can move closer to God’s design for love and relationships.

Let me know in the comment which one stood out for you. Check out the YouTube channel for the video version.

Before you continue, here's something you should consider: Ignite the spark in your marriage with "Seven Principles Making Marriage Work." Don't settle for mediocrity when you can experience a fulfilling and deeply connected partnership.


By Honey Let's Talk

I'm a certified relationship expert, professional counselor, and pastor. I've been helping people with their relationships for over 6 years. I'm passionate about helping people find and maintain healthy relationships.