Every relationship has its pitfalls and issues that come up over time. But it’s really easy to get caught up in your relationship and not pay attention to how it’s evolving into something that doesn’t feel good anymore.
That’s why it’s important to keep an eye out for relationship red flags because they can help you realize when something isn’t right with the relationship early on before things get too serious. If you want your relationship to last long term, then make sure you pay attention to some of the relationship red flags below.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned about relationships over the years, it’s that they’re never perfect and there will always be issues between two people no matter how much love exists between them. But sometimes those issues can get so big that they become insurmountable problems and end up destroying the relationship entirely.
That’s why it’s important to look for warning signs early on before things get too serious between two people because otherwise, it could lead to heartbreak down the road.
If you want your relationship to last long term, then make sure you pay attention to some of the relationship red flags below.
Constantly Flirting With Others
There’s nothing wrong with paying attention to other people in the room when you’re in a relationship, but if your significant other is constantly flirting with others even in front of you, then that should be a huge red flag.
Some people are flirtatious by nature because they have little control over their flirtatious behavior. That doesn’t mean that you should leave them because of it. But if your boyfriend or girlfriend is constantly flirting with others in front of you, then that’s a huge red flag.
If they’re not doing it just to get a rise out of you or for their own amusement, then there might be something going on behind the scenes that you’re not aware of. The best thing to do when you see this kind of behavior is to discuss it with your significant other in a calm and non-confrontational way, but be prepared for the possibility that they might not own up to their flirtatious behavior.
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Constantly Pushing Boundaries
When you first start dating somebody, you might find yourself testing the boundaries of the relationship. But if you find that your partner is constantly pushing those boundaries, then it could be a sign of trouble ahead.
People who like to push limits like to test people and see how far they can go before they get called out on their behavior. They do this because they want attention or they want to see if they can get away with it.
If you find that your partner is constantly testing the limits in the relationship, then it might be a sign of trouble ahead.
Being Over Controlling
When your spouse demands that you submit to their every whim and tries to control every aspect of your life, it’s a big warning sign.
Some people just have controlling tendencies, which is totally fine if both people in the relationship are okay with it. But when your partner tries to control everything, including what you do in your free time or how many hours you spend at work, then that’s a huge red flag.
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Lying About Little Things
If your significant other is constantly lying to you about little things, then that could be a huge warning sign that there are bigger lies in the future.
Some people just have a hard time being honest about little things, even when they have no reason not to tell the truth. But if you find yourself constantly getting excuses from your partner for why they didn’t do something they said they were going to do, then that’s a sure sign that bigger lies are on their way down the road.
Cheating has got to be the number one biggest red flag of them all. If you’re in a monogamous relationship, then it’s really not okay for your partner to cheat on you because there are no excuses that can justify infidelity.
It’s bound to lead to lots of mistrust and even violence in some relationships if it goes unresolved.
It’s best to address issues like this early on before they spiral out of control.
If you find yourself in an abusive relationship where your partner is being physically violent to you or threatening to be physically violent, then that’s a huge red warning sign.
Some people just have anger problems, which is totally fine if they work on controlling it. But when one person in the relationship has a hard time knowing how to stop arguing once they’ve started, then that’s a huge red flag.
Especially if they have a hard time admitting when they’ve made mistakes in the argument.
When Arguments Escalate Quick
Being in a relationship means you’re going to fight sometimes, but if your arguments seem to be escalating into something more each time, then that’s a huge red flag.
When you’re having an argument, it can sometimes feel like the situation is spiraling out of control and that you might not be able to personally recover from it.
That’s why if you notice that your arguments are escalating quickly between the two of you, then it may indicate a few things: there’s a lack of communication or understanding between two people or one of you is becoming increasingly angry and aggressive with the other person.
You may not realize it, but your behavior during an argument can say a lot about how serious things are between you and your partner. When one of you is getting more and more angry throughout the argument, then that’s a sign that there is some underlying tension that needs to be addressed.
Controlling Social Media
If you find yourself in a relationship where your significant other is constantly checking your text messages or social media accounts, then that’s a huge red flag.
Some people just have a hard time trusting others, but if you find that your partner is trying to control every aspect of your relationship from the outside, then it could be a sign of trouble ahead.
If they are constantly lying to you about their whereabouts
Are you constantly wondering where your significant other is and who they’re with? Or do you feel like they lie a lot about simple things that don’t need to be lied about?
If so, then it might be time to re-evaluate the relationship because something is going on that you’re not aware of.
If they are constantly lying to you, then it’s most likely because there is something else going on in their life that they don’t want you to know about. People tend to lie when the truth would be too shameful or damaging for them to reveal.
A lot of times, people will lie about little things that don’t matter just to feel like they’re in control of the relationship. For example, if you ask your significant other where they are and they say at home when really they’re out with their friends, then it’s probably because you tend to get jealous so they lie so you can’t tell what they’re doing.
When they don’t want to do anything with you
Generally speaking, someone who’s super into you will always be willing to do whatever it takes to see you and stay with you.
If they’re not doing what they can to make time for you or cancel plans last minute, then there’s probably another girl or guy that they’re spending their time with and might not view you as a priority anymore.
If there are no boundaries between work and home life
You shouldn’t let your job affect the relationship you have with your significant other.
But if your partner is always causing problems at work, talking about it excessively, and never respecting the boundaries of personal space, then that could be a warning sign that something is wrong in the relationship.
It doesn’t mean you have to call off the wedding or break up immediately, but it’s something to keep in mind.
If you feel like your relationship is moving too quickly
It can be hard to tell when the infatuation phase starts fading off and normalcy sets in, but if you find yourself rushing or forcing things between you two that don’t come naturally then it might mean that you’re in the infatuation phase of your relationship.
Being in love is an amazing feeling, but it can also be blinding to both people if they aren’t careful about how their actions are affecting one another.
If you find yourself steering away from what makes you feel like a couple and more toward what feels good for only one person, then it might mean you’re not in the infatuation phase anymore.
It can be hard to recognize when things are moving too quickly between two people, but if you feel like you and the person you’re dating aren’t on the same page and more than likely breaking up soon, then it might be time to rethink your relationship.
If they are rude to waiters and other service people
If they are rude to service people, then it’s a sign that they have a bad attitude and was raised with an entitled sense of privilege. They may also be abusive later on down the line when you least expect it.
In this case, you should never ignore relationship red flags like this because it could be a sign for worse things to come.
So make sure you pay attention to the warning signs early on in the relationship before it’s too late, otherwise you could end up regretting ignoring these red flags later on down the line.
They’re always looking for an excuse to fight.
One of the most common red flags in a relationship is when two people cannot have a conversation without it leading to an argument or them getting into some sort of disagreement.
This isn’t just annoying in a relationship, but it could also turn into something much worse like more serious forms of abuse.
If you notice that your partner has become very controlling, then it’s time to address how they’re acting and your relationship as a whole.
They’re not interested in your family and friends:
If your significant other is never interested in meeting or hanging out with your family and friends, then you need to ask yourself why.
If they don’t want you spending time with the people who love and care about you, then there’s a huge red flag waving in front of their face. It could be that they feel like your family and friends are holding you back from focusing more on your relationship with them.
But that’s not the case at all because everyone needs love and support from their loved ones. You can’t have a healthy relationship with someone if you’re afraid of spending time with them because they may not approve of what you’re doing.
Their friends come before you
If your partner is prioritizing their friends and not you, then that’s a sign that something isn’t right. They should prioritize the people they’re closest with and be there for them in good times and bad, but if their friends come before you, it means one of two things: either they don’t care about you as much as you care about them or their friends are toxic influences in their life.
It’s best to go with the latter because if they cared about you, then they would prioritize your relationship over their friend because that’s what healthy relationships are all about.
It seems like they only call when they want something from you
It’s really common for people to get into routines in their relationships. They’ll text or call when they want something but then they stop texting and calling once you do what they ask. If this is starting to happen, then it could be a red flag your partner doesn’t care about you as much as you think.
They isolate you from your friends and family
If your partner is preventing you from seeing your friends and family, then it’s definitely a warning sign for the relationship. If they’re not respecting your relationships with other people in your life, then you might want to take a step back and make sure the relationship is healthy.
“I’ve had this happen to me before and it was really hard. He would tell me how terrible all of my friends were and that I shouldn’t talk to them anymore if anything was ever wrong. But the more he isolated me from my friends, the more I realized something wasn’t right with the relationship.”
You never know how they’ll react to things, and it scares you sometimes.
They can be really sweet and affectionate one minute but then the next, they snap at something you said or did without any real reason. This is a warning sign that they’re unstable and could be potentially dangerous.
constantly compare you
They constantly compare you to other people in their life and put them on a pedestal while putting you down. You feel like there’s no way that they could ever love someone as much as they love themselves.
So next time they compare you to someone else in their life, ask them why they feel like it’s necessary for them to do so and whether or not there’s a reason behind them putting everything in perspective with what they’re seeing.
Unfortunately, a lot of people don’t pay attention to their relationship’s warning signs and ultimately end up regretting it later on. But if you pay attention to the red flags in your relationship, then you can avoid a lot of problems down the road.